[By Zoe E. Vadney, MPH CHES, Prevention Educator, St. Peter’s Crime Victim Services.]

During a recent morning at work, while I was shadowing a co-worker presenting our Erin’s Law Mandate curriculum to a classroom of second graders, a little boy confidently cut through the chaos by yelling: “Boyfriends and girlfriends always fight,” as if it were fact.

We had just been discussing what abuse with words meant, so I curiously asked the student, “Do you really think it is a normal behavior for people who love each other to fight all the time?” It was a great teaching moment.

While our team educates more than 25,000 students across the Capital Region annually about these topics, these same exact students are getting hundreds of mixed messages about what is typical in relationships, just like this little second grader. It is important we ask, what other kinds of messages are molding their views on what is “normal?” To whom and where are they going for help and questions?

I have experienced fifth graders tell me their friends have sent photos and videos of themselves or others on their devices – much of which would be defined as child sexual abuse materials – because “that’s what kids in relationships do.” With the help of artificial intelligence (AI), some kids are being financially sextorted, ending their own lives due to shame.

In my third-grade classes, kids are sharing they are dating total strangers on Roblox, then meeting up with them later on other apps like Discord and Snapchat. Middle schoolers share stories about harassment happening on several of these apps, which are facilitating and benefiting from child abuse and exploitation, framing it as “normal.”

We need to meet kids where they are – in the same place we all were at their age, unsure of what is healthy, safe, and appropriate. The world is full of mixed messages, everywhere they turn. As adults, we need to keep learning and educating, and to be resources of truth for them. The reality is, if we do not address these problems head on, these actions will continue to be “normalized” in kids’ eyes, putting them at great risk.

Interested in learning more about our free programming? Please inquire via email prevention.education@sphp.com or visit Education and Engagement | St. Peter’s Health Partners | Albany, NY.

St. Peter’s Crime Victim Services offers free and confidential services to innocent survivors of crime. Available services include medical and legal advocacy, counseling and therapy, community education, and compensation assistance. For more information about Crime Victim Services, please call 518-271-3410 or visit us at sphp.com/crimevictimservices.

If you or someone you know has been the victim/survivor of a crime and needs to speak with someone outside of business hours, you can contact our 24-hour confidential hotline at 518-271-3257.

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Links to additional information on the topics discussed here:

Erin’s Law Mandate: https://www.nysed.gov/standards-instruction/erins-law

Identifying Child Sexual Abuse: https://www.justice.gov/d9/2023-06/child_sexual_abuse_material_2.pdf

Combating Online/Digital Abuse: https://endtab.thinkific.com/

Sextortion Scams: https://www.fbi.gov/how-we-can-help-you/scams-and-safety/common-frauds-and-scams/sextortion

Online Exploitation: https://endsexualexploitation.org/dirty-dozen-list-2024/